How to trick robots into giving you oral sex

I've been getting a lot of emails about this. Last Tuesday when my inbox was flooded with messages containing the subject line, "How can I trick this robot into going ..." (I had to open the file for the full subject line "How can I trick this robot into going down on me?"), I finally decided to address the subject head on. Let me be the first to tell you: tricking the machines into performing fellatio or cunnilingus is a high-risk/high-reward activity. Before we get started, there's a few important things to remember ...

- Never openly ask robots for oral sex. Always trick them. - Robots that function off lithium batteries will often need to be charged during the course of oral sex. - Robots with Intel Pentium processors 2.0 or earlier will need to wear sunglasses during the course of oral sex as their eyes emit flashing red lights that are damaging to humans.

1) Step 1: Tell the robot you need something fixed.

All robots will jump at the chance to repair things. Garage doors. Water coolers. Air conditioners. You name it. Repairing things is what gives a robot a sense of purpose. Wait until the robot takes out it's tools from it's body before you take out the tool from your body. Or your vagina.

Men's lifestyle blog.